I have thought long and hard about his, and I have made a decision regarding our relationship.
When we first started being friends I thought you made me look cool. You made me look tough. As the years went on I became more and more reliant on you. You were always there for me, whenever I needed you. Bad day at work? You, to the rescue. Bored/tired/stressed/happy? There you are. You and I became so close that I thought about you virtually all the time, even though I was never a heavy user of you. Where is my lighter? Where's my pack..? I had to do a run through, an inventory, before leaving the house every day..whenever I would go out for dinner or to the bar I had to figure out where to keep you if I wasn't wearing a coat..i had to figure out how to carry my cell phone, house keys, and you too without looking like a pack mule.
You really were on my mind a lot. When you were not available, I missed you. I would get a little jittery or anxious. I pined for you. I jonesed for you. The flame, the first drag, the smell of the zippo...so good, you were.
But last week, something happened. I realized that our relationship has been a lie. You don't love me at all. You, Marlboro, have been slowly trying to kill me. I guess I knew that all along but your nicotine is so seductive it was tough to see this clearly.
You have been trying to kill me, but I won't let you. I want to live. I want to smell nice. I'm single now. I'm probably gonna be making out with some girls and they probably don't use you and why would I want to smell like a butt?
You have been trying to kill me, but it ain't gonna happen. I want to be there for my friends and family and my peeps. I might not be able to do that if you and I continue our relationship.
Today, I am a non smoker. Marlboro, you and I are finished. and I never want to see you again. Don't call me. It's over.
© 2012
